Because I dared to obey the law, even though I am an Outsider

So I return as a dissident, once again after 3 years. Why? Was it because all was well in the last 3 years? Actually, far from it. All that was going around me had fallen to unbelievable depths of indignity and continuing to break newer levels.

So, once again, why was I not disappointed by all that. Maybe I was. Maybe I was much more than disappointed; but maybe not affected. The rapes going on around me were not happening to someone in my family. Migrants from other states were being beaten and humiliated, farmers were committing suicide somewhere else; but what did that mean to me. Possibly a good point to talk about while sipping scotch with my friends on a nice Saturday evening, with precedence being suddenly taken over by the burning question - where should we eat tonight.

So, yes I confess, I finally bothered to express my dissidence only when the boot found my bottom. But post this entry, I would certainly try to write about a more things I observe and choose to comfortably overlook.

So, coming back to my story of the day. Lately, I tried to do at least one less wrong deed in my daily life that I felt might be troubling others. I had started thinking about it coinciding with the national outrage over corruption due to the efforts of Anna's movement. I had tweeted then "Corruption is - when you choose to jump a red light if the cop isn't watching" (I'll take this up in another blog post).

And this is for what caused the events of today. My fault was that I bothered to obey a red light not manned by cops before the money minting hours of evening rush. I went a step ahead and stopped before the zebra crossing, which is of course an outrage for all of us owning vehicles; after all, the roads are only for us and not for the low lives walking on foot. Luckily, most of the citizens of this great nation have not lost their senses and they do not act in the manner in which I did. So as should happen to miscreants like me, an enlightened soul crashed his front bumper into me, causing substantial damage. Before I could recover from the shock, he sped off. Since the signal was already red, the oncoming traffic stopped him. I went and stood in front of his vehicle and as soon as the occupants came out, I should have known I had stirred the "holier than thou". Standing before me were two Marathis on their beloved motherland and I, a mere outsider had dared to challenge them. Before, going further, let me clarify that this could've happened anywhere else in the country where if an "outsider" would've challenged the "Sons of the soil", the outcome would've been identical.

At this point a few people from surrounding shops had also come and stopped the vehicle that had hit me. And then the miracle of this democracy happened. The occupants of the vehicle tested the waters and started speaking in Marathi and I committed the cardinal sin - I replied in India's "National" language. The few "outsiders" who were standing there  quickly moved out for their own good. Now instead of being the offenders, they metamorphosed into the champions of the locals. The locals had  finally found the cause of all the troubles in their miserable personal lives. Finally, they had someone whom they could abuse and vent out their anger, for all that they were facing at the hands of those who could do the same to them. I was told point blank to pay for a new bumper as it had got damaged for the simple reason that I existed. Had that not been the case, such a tragedy would not have befallen them. All the sons of the soil felt that this was a real magnanimous gesture for which I was truly unworthy. I felt that I do not have a voice, as my words didn't match the tongue of the mob.

And here at this point, I saw the shinning beacon of India's democracy - the traffic cop. As he had reached there just before the bonus round of the traffic hour he was greeted with this jackpot of an accident. This gentleman went and inspected that the other vehicle and hit and run on a traffic signal; but his happiness was put on hold. He was greeted with words of Marathi and he of course realized that the other party was an outsider. The ties of the soil are of course much stronger than those of the law. He asked me point blank - "Marathi mayte tula" (You know Marathi), to which I could only confess my sin and that too in the worst possible way - again using India's National Language. Of course I disgusted him, but he was benevolent to me and told me - "Chal nikal le" (Get lost quickly). But I was overstretching my welcome and I persisted by saying that I was only obeying the traffic signal. This was most ghastly of course on my part, to expect a fair decision and that too against the sons of the soil. I was told to turnover my license and vehicle papers and present myself in the Chowki (police station). The alternative was simpler, just stay there while he goes back and the mob would thrash me.

I wasn't feeling scared right then but rather stunned. I was blankly staring at this cop and the guys who had hit me. I told them, "lets go to the police station". I did so not because of any miraculously new found faith in India's legal setup, but with a feeling of simple curiosity. I didn't feel any anger or outrage. In fact I felt quite indifferent, the same way when I see a news channel or a movie (I just realized that they do seem so similar in so many ways).

Once having reached the police station, these guys stopped me outside only. I was told that a FIR could be booked against me. I said, "Ok". Then the cop said that I would have to go to the courts. I again said, "Ok". I seriously was not doing this with any preconceived thought or an intent of defiance. I certainly don't have any weird notions like righteousness would ultimately prevail. Nor I was trying to call bluff to what I was being told. Finally I was asked that I should pay the "Kharcha" (cough up dough) and stop tormenting them as all of them were really hard pressed for time. I again just replied, No. None of my answers carried any emotion, either of anger or strength; they could possibly be best defined as disinterested.

Am not sure, what really broke their heart - the lack of anger or the lack of interest or not being totally scared out my wits. They simply left me in front of the police station and went off their ways. I too just came back to my place, absolutely not understanding that what had actually happened.

Now after I've written all this it's really sounding trivial compared to what all goes on around me. I would not even want to mention that here, because this experience is not worth being put across those horrors. But all I could make out of this is that we've all become very institutionalized to exploitation. Exploitation and not being exploited. Simply put, we believe that it is absolutely fine that  if I can get hold of a weaker person in my domain its in my power to decide his fate. And certainly, as an extension, if I am the weaker guy somewhere, it's my bottom - his boot. And this is truly sad. After all these years of evolution, we as nation at least are still way back there. You can stretch this in many of the things that are happening around us today and find this as a commonality. I hope I could write about them too. After all, I am institutionalized too and there is nothing more I expect than writing about it. 

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

This might very well turn out to be my third post in a row which I delete. Why delete?? Simple coz I thought that my earlier words were too caustic and I had a serious fear of repercussions. THE FEAR OF THE ESTABLISHMENT.
And where do I see this fear....I see it all around me....all the time. I know am sounding too paranoid, but ain't it true for all of us. Don't all of us get a little iffy if we see traffic policemen on some crossing. Doesn't it cause all of us a little discomfort if a uniformed cop just stops us even to just ask directons. Shouldn't it be just the other way round. Doesn't the presence of Police supposed to instill somekind of a sense of security in us? So, Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?!
Was having coffee outside Pune airport just now, which is something like 4 in the morning. A single female flier was there too and looked at ease even though the rest of the 12-13 people here were all men. The moment a police fellow moves in, the lady wraps her self tighter in her shawl. Was it just instinctive or otherwise, I can't say; but lemme just say this ain't the first time I've seen this reaction.
And who might today be most carefree from the law enforcing agencies today. I think it would only be the ones who toy around with the law these days. Its a funny business you see. Its just like being the class bully. If you don't kick butt, its your butt which gets kicked. If you are someone who likes to keep the law in your pocket, along with a lot of black money or a mobile full of numbers of really powerful people, you needn't give two hoots to the Law enforcing agencies. If on the other hand, you are a simple "Nobody" like the most of us here, you better just mutter obsecinities behind the "Thula's" back, but hold on tight to your nuts if you are actually accosted by one, for one reason or none.
As long as the people of this land need to fear their own "custodiets", there ain't actually no real freedom of in this land. The freedom envisioned for this land was

WHERE the mind is without fear and the head is held high
Where knowledge is free
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

Guess its high time we ask, have we atually achieved what we began to seek many decades ago?

Dissident or NOT!!

As am starting to write this entry, am thinking if I've honestly picked up a right name for myself?

Am I actually a dissident or just a part of majority which is living on the edge of total decadence. A majority that has started to exist without any sense of purpose. Is filling my own stomach and progeny my only reason to be on this earth. Too long have I been a part of the majority. Too long have I been hearing and not listening. Too long have I had sight but no vision. Too long have I thought why has the world, and the man in general, become so selfish and abandoned the thought as soon as I had the most trivial of things cross my path.

Today I care more for getting the window seat on the bus, than a human child dying. And if it sounds too gross, you may choose to ask yourself and you might not be too different from me. And that's why I say, maybe I am a part of the majority after all.

I'm writing all this out here, maybe 'cause I've nothing better to do. Am really thinking now, would I've even bothered had I had a slight headache or a plan for a movie.

Maybe and maybe not. Only time will tell, if I live up to be a renegade or just another person with an Internet connection and some spare time.

Issidentday

Issidentday. інакомислячий. muhalif. oliktänkande. раскольник. szakadár. διαφωνών. معاند. منشق. Dissident.

Adjective
1. Characterized by departure from accepted beliefs or standards.
2. Disagreeing, especially with a majority.
Noun
1. A person who dissents from some established policy.